4931 Famous Quotes In Our Database
522 Silly Quotes
This is page 31 of 35 pages displaying a total of 522 Silly quotes.
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When I masturbate, I always buy myself dinner and flowers first, so that I'll feel I haven't used myself.
-- Neil Mohammed |
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Cat: a pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs, and patronizes human beings.
-- Oliver Herford |
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Here lies the body of John Mound
Lost at sea and never found.
-- on an Irish gravestone |
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Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.
-- on the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong |
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If this is your first visit to USSR, you are welcome to it.
-- on the door of a Moscow hotel room |
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To stop the drip, turn cock to right.
-- on the faucet in a Finnish washroom |
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Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger: roasted duck let loose, beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.
-- on the menu of a Polish hotel |
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Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
-- on the menu of a Swiss reataurant |
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Ghana is, as you perhaps in Korea, and is regarded as the high-qualified Ghana our marvelous, smooth and mild whole already know, enjoying high reputation selling chocolates masterpieces of all milk chocolate.
-- on the wrapper of Korean Ghana brand chocolate bar |
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Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
-- Oscar Wilde |
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I can resist anything but temptation.
-- Oscar Wilde |
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Ladies have fits upstairs.
-- outside a Hong Kong dress shop |
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Dresses for street walking.
-- outside a Paris dress shop |
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The only really good vegetable is Tabasco sauce. Put Tabasco sauce in everything. Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin. The next best vegetable is the jalapeno pepper. It has the virtue of turning salads into practical jokes.
-- P. J. O'Rourke |
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Tell me why the sky is blue,
Tell me why the sexes are two,
Tell me why bananas are curved,
And I will tell you what you deserve.The sky is blue 'cause it's full of doubt,
The sexes are two 'cause the rest died out,
Bananas are curved to return when thrown,
And I deserve a newsgroup of my own.
-- Percival Platypus |
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