3354 Bar Jokes In Our Database
200 Bar Jokes
This is page 2 of 20 pages displaying a total of 200 Bar jokes.
<< PREVIOUS 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 | 10-19 NEXT >>
|
A guy walks into a bar - bar joke A guy walks into a bar with a German shepherd dog. The bartender says, "Hey buddy, can't you read that sign? It says no dogs allowed! Get that mutt out of here!" The man replies, "No, I can't read the sign--I'm blind, and this is my Seeing Eye dog." The bartender is embarrassed and gives the man a beer on the house. Later that day, the man tells his friend about it: "I told him I was blind, and I got a free beer!" The friend then takes his dog into the bar and sits down. The bartender says, "The sign says no dogs allowed! You'll have to leave!" The friend says, "Sorry, I can't see the sign because I'm blind, and this is my Seeing Eye dog." The bartender replies, "Since when do they give out Chihuahuas as Seeing Eye dogs?" The man says, "They gave me a Chihuahua?" |
|
A man walks into a bar - bar joke A Northerner walks into a bar in the Deep South around Christmas time. A small nativity scene is behind the bar, and the guy says, "That's a nice nativity scene. But how come the three wise men are all wearing firemen's hats?" And the bartender says, "Well, it says right there in the Bible--the three wise men came from afar." |
|
A man walks into a bar - bar joke A man goes into a bar and says, "Give me a drink before the trouble starts." And the bartender pours him a drink. He drinks it and says, "Give me another drink before the trouble starts." He downs that one and says," Quick, give me another drink before the trouble starts." Finally, the bartender asks, "Just when is this trouble going to start?" The man says, "The trouble starts just as soon as I tell you that I don't have any money." |
|
A guy walks into a bar - bar joke A fellow walks into a pub near Buckingham Palace in London, sits down, and says, "Give me a beer. I've had a rough day at work." the bartender says, "Oh? What do you do?" The guy says, "I take care of the corgis--you know, the dogs the royal family owns." The bartender asks, "Tough job, huh? The guy says, "Yeah. All that inbreeding has led to low intelligence and bad temperaments. And the dogs aren't too smart, either." |
|
An Irishman walks out of a bar.... An Irishman walks out of a bar.... Hey, it COULD happen |
|
A Crow walks into a bar - bar joke A crow walks into a bar wearing a pearl necklace. He orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender says "I've never seen a crow wearing a pearl necklace before". The crow says, "What do you expect me to wear with basic black?" |
|
A cowboy walks into a bar - bar joke A cowboy walks into a bar. Upon leaving, he realizes that someone has painted his horse. The cowboy yells, "Which one of you Idiots painted my horse?" A seven foot tall mean looking guy says, "I did." The cowboy realizes he is in trouble and replies, "Why, thank you - the first coat's dry!" |
|
Shakespeare walks into a bar - bar joke Shakespeare walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a beer. "I can't serve you." says the bartender. "You're Bard!" |
|
A drunk staggers out of a ba- bar joke A drunk staggers out of a bar and runs right into two priests. He says, "I'm Jesus Christ." The first priest says, "No, son, you're not." So the drunk says it to the second priest. The second priest says, "No, son, you're not." The drunk says, "Look, I can prove it." He walks back into the bar with the two priests. The bartender takes one look at the drunk and exclaims, "Jesus Christ, you're here again?" |
|
A peice of rope walks into a bar- bar joke A piece of rope walks into a bar and the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." The rope goes outside, ties himself in a knot and frays one end of himself. He walks back into the bar and the bartender says, "Weren't you just in here?" The rope replies, "Nope, I'm a frayed knot." |
<< PREVIOUS 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 | 10-19 NEXT >>
